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June Sixteen

6/16/2012

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50/50

*Blush.*
I finished 50 Shades of Grey.
*Blush.* 
And I read 50 Shades Darker as well.

I enjoyed them! I was all set to be offended because we should not support women demeaning themselves for a man, or buying into the idea that women are perfect victims, or sexual playthings, or toys.

I know. I know. I wrote about embracing any book you like and not falling for the hype. Still, I was wary of the "mommy porn" label and the subtle innuendo attached to such a label that somehow by enjoying the book you are weird or unfulfilled. Not at all. People, if you like romance, this book is for you. People, if you have ever been curious about S & M ( I’m dating myself and my ignorance of the lifestyle here),  if you’re curious or know someone in it or just out of it or avoiding it, then this is a good book to help explore the idea. {SPOILER alert- reading below may spoil the book for you.}

If you only like hoity toity books that are very high brow and literary with words flowing like gentle breezes and perfect punctuation and grammar and editing and characters of uncompromising ideals…well, keep looking!

When I read a book I seek entertainment, enlightenment, awareness.  I love to learn something or feel something and I love a good laugh, and occasionally a good cry.

This book had a lot of that. It reminded me of Twilight because of all the yearning. The press has stirred controversy saying 50 Shades of Grey is too much like Twilight (especially since it started as fan fiction) to which I reply, BAH.  She changed it to be a different set of characters and a complete divergence of plot and concept. The female protagonist of Grey was very different and (I thought) more likable than in Twilight.

You know what it also reminded me of? Gone with the Wind. And some Susan Elizabeth Phillips books that I’ve loved and also some by Judith McKnaught.

The sex is explicit. Not for the faint of heart. Without the sex the book would be 2/3 less. The sex tells the story of their unfolding power and emotional connections and disconnections. No pun intended.

It’s an interesting way to convey a complicated romance. The details were very modern and authentic. The character’s pasts and personalities were fleshed out and built upon to explain their actions and to show their growth.  A main theme of 50 Shades of Grey is how a horrible trauma can shape a person deeply but not necessarily forever.  Change to a degree is possible; hence the shades of gray word play.

We like the show Dexter at my house too. That’s also about a person’s dark reaction to a terrible past trauma.  But in Dexter, the main character kills people. Whereas in 50 Shades of Grey, the main male character likes consensual but aberrant sex. Why is Dexter critically acclaimed and 50 Shades of Grey spat upon?
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Sexism people, sexism.

The concept is the same but the way it’s portrayed is different in style, technique, gender, and some would say skill. Hey, women can get their kicks, too.  Shades of Grey is geared to titillate women while Dexter is aimed at men. You can tell this by the perspective of the sex and the characters whose point of view you follow.  In both, men use women until they find one that won’t let them. The woman at the heart of 50 Shades of Grey is strong, not perfect, but strong. She knows her own mind and is able and willing to compromise- to a point. I liked that. It detailed her honest reaction to deviant behavior and then her intelligent consideration of her own limits. And remarkably, she did not totally capitulate but again, compromised. 

Plus, the couple had honest interactions- which is unusual in a romance novel and very heartening. (In Dexter and Twilight, relationships and plots are built on lies.) In many ways, Shades of Grey has a good example of a couple from different starting points merging in the middle. So why all the hating, haters?

If you’re looking for literary genius, no one said it was in 50 Shades of Grey. If you seek a moral compass in your reading, be more careful what you pick up. Again, I wonder why people waste their breath not liking things instead of just using that energy to find things they DO like. There is a reason readers like this book and it should be accepted as having value for that very fact.

I would like to do a study. (The studies I’m proposing are adding up people; we need funding for all this social research!)  A study polling the negative reviewers and random haters out there asking: Have they read it? All of it? What were they looking for? What did they get? 

I think it would be very revealing. 

Come out of the shade and fess up! Hype’s just that. If you have an open mind when you open the pages then you’ll be able to see that it’s not all good or bad, black or white.  

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Just Sayin',
gregorific

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